Cabin Fever

It’s Saturday, the sun is shining and at the moment the breeze outside the caravan is cool but tolerable so it’s lovely to be able to sit outside under the shade of the awning and enjoy the morning sunshine.  It seems as though it’s been such a long time since I was able to do that. 

What else can I expect?  It’s winter, and I’m in Melbourne!  It may not be as cold here as in other parts of Victoria, but it’s still cold and lately I’ve been really feeling the grey, wet miserable gloom of a Melbourne winter.  I feel like it’s seeped into my bones and has affected my state of happiness.

I feel like I want to be eating 'something' constantly, yet I’m not really hungry.  Maybe I’m bored?  I’ve always hated that word, ‘bored’, but perhaps that feeling of boredom also comes back to the grey skies and cold weather that have me feeling like I don't really want to do anything or go anywhere? 

In a quiet moment this morning, it occurred to me that perhaps I have been suffering from a common ailment that can sometimes affect Grey Nomads;  It's known as ‘Cabin Fever’ and normally comes from being cooped up inside the caravan for long periods of time when the inclement weather becomes just too awful to spend much time outside. 

I’ve had this topsy-turvy feeling in my moods, incredibly restless and desperate all of a sudden to have a house of my own or a cottage, a unit, in fact anything that has a little bit more space than the inside of our twenty five foot caravan. 

I’ve spent hours, in fact days, weeks even, trolling the internet perusing houses for sale in all of my favourite country towns and then having internal arguments with myself!  Is this really what I want?  Am I ready to give up the Grey Nomad lifestyle in preference for life in a house or cottage in a country town?  Am I really ready to stop travelling?

Perhaps it's just the knowledge that at present we are living in limbo that has me feeling this way? Yes limbo!  That's where my life is at present.  Our lives, really;  both mine and my husband's as we go through this round once more of treatment, scans, more side effects and everything else that consumes your daily thoughts and life as we hope for a cure and and end to his cancer. Recurring cancer is harder in some ways because we know so much more this time round than the first time.   

Who would have thought it would come back?  Certainly not either of us, we were happily travelling along enjoying our travels as well as our farm sits and believing that being in remission would last forever.   I guess two years remission is pretty good?  A permanent cure would be even better though! 

So now the sun is out, for the second day in a row.  Suddenly I feel inspired to actually want to do things.  My time of hibernation might be coming to an end and Spring will be here very soon.  Oh roll on summer !

My Unfinished Busy-ness

We’re housesitting on a 1200 acre property in the south-east of South Australia.  Surrounded by majestic red gums and a colourful garden, the house is a beautiful old sandstone homestead with 14 foot ceilings and creaking floorboards that I’m sure must hold untold secrets of a bygone era.

Bertie the cat is curled up beside me on the old leather couch, both us basking in the warmth of the morning sun as it streams through the window.

I'm surrounded by books, in fact if I stop to count the various piles on tables, cabinets, and any bit of spare space around me, there’s actually 37 in total.  All different, all intriguing and many that I would love to immerse myself in.  A small metal plaque screwed to the bottom of a timber bookshelf says "Railway Museum Liverpool Street London", and has me wondering about the story that must accompany that lovely old piece of furniture. 

In the 'front room' - the formal lounge, there are more shelves and more books. In fact I'm overwhelmed and want to read them all, yet my busy brain cant seem to settle long enough to just finish reading one, it’s thirsty for more.  Like a kid in a lolly shop, I keep going from one treat to the next to the next.

I am filled with a desire to create.  Having never been very artistic or creative I have no idea what it is my heart wants to craft.  I have some unfinished tea cosies I’ve been knitting, an ongoing, unfinished tapestry that challenges me to return to it soon, patterns and balls of alpaca yarn wait patiently for me, and I’m suddenly aware that I seem to have a lot of ‘unfinished stuff’ about me, including my practice on the recorder.  I know if I don’t pick that little instrument up soon I’ll start to forget the notes and how to read the little bit of music that I’ve learnt thus far.  Yet my normally active self seems to have temporarily ‘retired’.  Even my usual routine of one hour’s exercise each day has come to a standstill these last few days.  Is it the grey skies that have affected my get-up-and-go?  Because I feel sure it’s got-up-and-went!

I’ve not played or knitted or even stitched for over two weeks, yet this creative yearning doesn’t seem to want to pick up needles or any musical instrument, so they wait patiently for me, and I’m left wondering what it is I need to be doing to satisfy this current crafty, creative yearning? 

How do I go about capturing a little bit of self-discipline?  I’ve tried giving myself a good talking to, I’ve tried walking outside into the sunshine but the wind is cool and the sun has now gone behind a cloud and sends me running back inside.  I’ve tried self-recrimination, scolding and self-loathing and decided that all of those things only make it worse.  Time to start being kind to myself.   Compliments, encouragement and a bit of self-love instead.  Yes that’s sure to get me going.

OK!  That's it! I’m off to DO.

Cheers till next time.

Reminiscing with Pooh!

How totally delicious!  I've spent a few hours today singing along with Pooh! Pouring over Winnie the Pooh books, and taking a delightful trip down memory lane.

So much of our childhood was spent in the company of Christopher Robin!  All three of us would sit entranced on the couch in the lounge room (my elder sister Cynthia and brother Andrew), and we'd listen through the crackles on the record being played on the 'radiogramme'.

I can almost 'smell' the timber of that radiogramme.  It had a special kind of smell and so did the records inside the cupboards that housed all the 45's and LP's

How I wish I could SING some of these beautiful songs to you (on second thoughts it's probably just as well that in this forum I cant!).  Amazing and also truly wonderful that after 50+ years I STILL remember all the words of every song!  And  here's a sample:

I could spend a happy morning

Seeing Roo,

I could spend a happy morning

Being Pooh.

For it doesn't seem to matter,

If I don't get any fatter

(And I don't get any fatter),

What I do.

Oh, I like his way of talking,

Yes I do.

It's the nicest way of talking

Just for two.

And a Help-yourself with Rabbit

Though it may become a habit,

Is a pleasant sort of habit

For a Pooh.

I could spend a morning

Seeing Piglet.

And I couldn't spend a happy morning

Not seeing Piglet.

And it doesn't seem to matter

If I don't see Owl and Eeyore

(or any of the others),

And I'm not going to see Owl or Eeyore

(or any of the others)

Or Christopher Robin.

Why "Making A Difference" ?

I had cause today to do a little 'reflecting' on my 'journey of Transformation and Personal Development particularly over the last 12 months as I continue my travels throughout Australia.  How blessed I am feeling right now, as a Licensed "Heal Your Life" Workshop Leader to be able to travel this great land, seeing amazing sights AND presenting workshops along the way.  Making A Difference?  Yes absolutely!

I've been a "student" of Personal Development for more than 20 years and through my prior work as a Health & Wellness Consultant I discovered I really loved helping people achieve positive results in their lives.  

Daily working on "me" throughout that period helped me to uncover my purpose in life: to Make A Difference For Others.

Louise L. Hay first came into my life in 2003 in the form of a little self esteem audio.  For almost 12 months I listened to that audio cassette nightly, as it gently and lovingly helped me through a particularly challenging period in my life.

In 2009, after experiencing a severe financial setback through some poor business decisions I'd made, the book "You Can Heal Your Life" came into my hands exactly when I needed it!  I attended a Heal Your Life Workshop soon after and knew by the end of that workshop, that this was the 'work' I wanted to be doing - helping others to also 'peel back the layers' and continuing in my own personal growth along the way.

I'm excited to be able to bring the work of Louise Hay to others,and look forward to sharing a wonderful journey with you!  I invite you to visit my website:  www.MakingADifferenceForOthers.com to find out about the next workshop!

Life Loves You!

"LIFE ON THIS PLANET is an adventure—from the moment we’re born until the time we take our last breath. Life is a madcap caper—scary, exhilarating, boring, peaceful, loving—it’s an escapade. Life is a quest. Life is a thrill. Life is romance. Life is a lark. Life is!

We all experience every emotion possible, and oftentimes, we don’t like being in the game of Life. We can be afraid and try to protect ourselves from criticism. We can hide, but then we may miss the wonderful adventure that’s available to us. Everyone is afraid of something, but we can do it anyway.

Part of the adventure of Life is going through our fears and coming out on the other side—stronger and even more triumphant. No one is more courageous and adventurous than a baby fighting its way down the birth canal—struggling for its first breath, or a child taking its first steps.

You can’t hide from Life. Life is here for you to live to the fullest. Take your courage in your hands and move out into Life. Ask for what you want. Believe that you deserve it, and then allow Life to give it to you. Be sure that you’re willing to receive. Life can’t give to you if your hands are closed. Open your mind, open your heart, and open your arms. Life loves you and only wants to give you the best."

Louise L. Hay, the author of the international bestseller You Can Heal Your Life, is a metaphysical lecturer and teacher with more than 50 million books sold worldwide. For more than 30 years, she has helped people throughout the world discover and implement the full potential of their own creative powers for personal growth and self-healing. She has appeared on The Oprah Winfrey Show and many other TV and radio programs both in the U.S. and abroad.